EastEnders a weird programme

As I have mentioned before this getting old business is not all it is cracked up to be but it has the advantage that I can go to my caravan when ever I want. The Park I am on has a swimming pool so I swim at 8am every morning in the Adult Swim time between 8am till 9am and I have several Bar B Q’s as you can see.

BUT

Because we are in a caravan I sometime have to 

watch those dreadful Soaps Val likes. The worse one has to be EastEnders (Rear Enders as I call it for obvious reasons).  As you most probably realise I do not watch this on a regular basis but I am told is all about the lives of normal London’s East End. Yet after only 5 minutes I found out that there were several Homosexuals, several Lesbians, Transsexuals, Bisexual and an Alcoholic now am I expected to believe that this is meant to be a normal society in the East End ?

Now the  'Integrated Household Survey', the Office for National Statistics, just 1.1% said they were 'gay' or 'lesbian' and 0.4% said they were bisexual.  0.01% of the population are Transsexual. So EastEnders is anything but normal just a programme to promote these abnormal people as being normal OR am I abnormal I do not have any Gay friends and certainly do not have any transsexual’s friends but sadly I do know some alcoholics

Any rate I dare not watch any other soap’s as I expect they are just as bad will keep listening to the Archers a story of weird Country folk

Do not read if easily upset

News flashes:

Now on sale at IKEA - beds for lesbians: no nuts or screwing involved, it's all tongue and groove.

A Muslim has been shot with a starting pistol; police say it's definitely race related.

Due to a water shortage in Ireland , Dublin swimming baths have announced they are closing lanes 7 and 8.

I got a letter from Screw Fix Direct thanking me for my interest, but explaining they were not a dating agency.

The lead actor in the local pantomime production of Aladdin was anally raped by the gay genie on stage last night - to be fair the audience did try to warn him.

Such an unfair world. When a man talks dirty to a woman its considered sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man its £2.50/min (charges may vary)

Just booked a table for Valentine's Day for me and the wife. Bound to end in tears though - she's crap at snooker.

Met a beautiful girl down at the park today. Sparks flew, she fell at my feet and we ended up having sex there and then. God, I love my new Taser!

Got a new Jack Russell pup today, he's mainly black and brown with just a small white area so I've called him Bradford.

If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tins of ham then delete it. It's Spam.

They say that sex is the best form of exercise. Now correct me if I'm wrong but I don't think 2 minutes and 15 seconds every 6 months is going to shift this beer belly.

I've just watched a documentary about children being beaten and abused in Indian sweat shops. Looking at the quality of stitching on my new trainers the little bastards deserved it!

When I was a kid people used to cover me in chocolate and cream and put a cherry on my head. Yeah, life was tough in the gateau.

 There were four churches and a synagogue in a small town: a Presbyterian church, a Baptist church, a Methodist church, a Catholic church and a Jewish synagogue. Each church and the synagogue had a problem with squirrels.

The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about their squirrels. After much prayer and consideration they determined the squirrels were predestined to be there and they shouldn’t interfere with God’s divine will.

At the Baptist church, the squirrels had taken an interest in the baptistery. The deacons met and decided to put a water slide on the baptistery and let the squirrels drown themselves. The squirrels liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim, so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week.

The Methodist church decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God’s creatures. So, they humanely trapped their squirrels and set them free near the Baptist Church. Two weeks later the squirrels were back when the Baptists took down the water slide.

But the Catholic Church came up with a very creative strategy. They baptized all the squirrels and consecrated them as members of the church. Now they only see them on Christmas and Easter.

Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue. They took one squirrel and circumcised him; they haven’t seen a squirrel since.

May Bank Holiday

SwaleCliffe

Well May Bank Holiday turned out quite nice especially 

Saturday. I have my caravan at a seasonal pitch in Swalecliffe Nr Whitstable so took my grandchildren down there for the Saturday where they spent most of the day in the Pool. 
 t

I had to  return home, as I was a Referee for a Charity Tug-of-War on the Sunday.  was a day of various stalls, musicians etc. it was organised by Jo Murphy who was raising money for an young girls who has a form of Leukaemia  “ Unite and Fight for Shannon” Fun Day

Whitstable as expected was very busy, a brilliant place to visit.  Plenty of entertainment many Morris men and Morris Women can someone explain why every other person has a dog in some cases more then one? Whitstable has very narrow pavement yet wherever you go you nearly fall over a Dog if they are not walking they are being carried. The Harbour was full and still there were loads of Dogs, is a dog now becoming an added extra for the beautiful people? How can a dog enjoyed being pulled about and trodden on

Where are the Yanks

Began the Englishman

As I see it," began the Englishman, "Europe is a sinking ship. It may well be best for England to disembark, while it still can. I think smaller tends to be better when it comes to political frameworks. Right now, in the EU, you have 28 countries beholden to a bunch of politicians in Brussels. But no one government can effectively administer that vast an array of people... languages... economies... cultures...

"That's partly why it's a mess. I mean, you've got Greece, which has basically been suffering a grinding, multi-year depression because they can't maneuver independently of the big powers, those being Germany and France...

"Then there's Italy, Portugal, and Spain. None of them doing too well. If you look at unemployment levels there—particularly among the youth—you could even argue they're in a depression, too.

"What was supposed to be a common project to bring nations together, may well be, at root, pushing them apart again

St Michaels Road

J ELMER <jelmer33@btinternet.com>	28 Apr (3 days ago)
to sittingbourne

Regarding closure of St Michaels Road for minimum 6 months as reported in Sittingbourne News Extra.

This raises the issue of traffic gridlock in Sittingbourne using A2 and surrounding area roads.

There is not enough suitable roads or any preparation road upgrade work undertaken to alleviate A2 and town gridlock for lorries & cars.

Note railway bridge at Crown Quay Lane which is link to Eurolink Way that can by pass St Michaels Road only allows a lorry to pass in either direction by straddling both lanes of a two lane road.

Conclude the Emergency services & KCC Highways are content to lock up the town traffic and A2 in both directions.

Assume that council and its officers have imposed no daily charges on developers for every day over 6 months that work is undertaken and causes traffic chaos on A2 and surrounding area, based on previous work undertaken in town?

Council wants to re-develope an area but wants the public to subsidise development with approx. £30 million loan to assist developer a private company. Then build a multi storey car park on site of a demolished multi storey whilst building homes without sufficient parking on existing car parks. 

So much for intellectual rigour, application of common sense by councillors, council officers and KKC highways using local knowledge and the adverse effects to be caused by closing the main through (A2) road for town by at least 6 months!

Additionally public funds/liabilities are being used to subsidise a private developer; hope the local MP and the government auditor will examine the council accounts along with the accounts of those councillors and council officers involved in promoting such a poor deal for the people paying council tax and the general tax payer.

John Elmer

33 Cherryfields

Sittingbourne